Reasons I should not have ridden my bike today

4/16/14

• Over the last summer and winter, my handlebars have disintegrated to a sticky gross texture. As a result, my hands are oily and stained black.

•  I have no idea where I'm supposed to be biking. In the road? Yes, there are signs. "Share the road". But what about on the sidewalks between the footbridge with a bike lane, and the road? Am I allowed to bike here if I don't run over any people? Do I have to walk my bike? Do I look stupid for walking my bike?

• Weather. Everything that goes with weather. First off, today was not pretty. Alternating between a very cold rain and snow, my bike seat was very wet. This resulted in either a wet butt (which would turn into a freezing butt), or a wet sleeve (which would result in a freezing hand).

• Still on the weather topic. Regardless of my direction of travel, I was pelted continuously in the face by tiny hail balls that melted when they hit my skin. With stinging eyes, I looked down for the majority of the trip. Probably not safe among pedestrians and traffic?

• Think we're done with weather yet. Hehe. This one could be solved with gloves, but, of course, I don't know where mine are. My hands were FREEZING by the time I got anywhere. Not just cold. We're talking popsicles. Locking up a bike is very complicated when you have no feeling in your fingers. 

• I think my bike might be broken. I'm not exactly great with bicycle anatomy, but sometimes when I peddle, the chain goes wonky and it doesn't move the tires. I'm just peddling away and going nowhere. And of course, that happened this morning on my way to class; when I was late and looked terrible. Right next to my R.A. I'm pretty sure she already thinks I'm a bit crazy.

• Remember the wet butt part? Wasn't really avoided. I have a splash guard on my back tire, but there is a small section that shit can still get through. And where does it spray? Right on my bum.

To do list: 

• Figure out how bike chains work.

• Get a plastic bag for my seat.

• Find gloves.

• Cover my handlebars.

Fuck it. I'm just walking tomorrow.